Friday, August 05, 2005

Acu-PUNCTURE!!!

You know, I really miss the fine chiropractic services that we have in North Am. Coming to Korea, I thought that chiropractors would be a dime a dozen. Not so not so. People who want to stick you with sharp pointy objects are a dime a dozen. What a wonderful idea. Bored, don't know what to do? I have an idea! Let's go and pay some dude to stick needles in our backs. Yah! Doesn't that sound like righteous fun?!

I have this chronic problem with my back. I have this rib that wont stay in place and it really messes things up. My bed is a piece of .... and I wake up every morning stiff and sore like someone was kicking me all night long. Sometimes I can't even turn my neck. Candy you say? No thanks, I'll just chew on my Advil.

I was thinking about this the other morning as I was lying there in pain. You know what I wish they would develop? Laser sutures. I would love it if they could shoot some laser into my back, (hmmm, maybe through the needles) and stitch that stupid rib back into place. Wouldn't that be wonderful. Oh, I cry just thinking about it.

Ok, back to reality. :-) So, I get to the point (ha) that I just can't take it any more. I think I'm becoming immune to Advil. It doesn't seem to be working any more. That can't be good. What!!?! My liver went where???!!!

Right, so, I can't take it any more. In desperation, I'll try anything. Well, I find this Chinese Medicine place, dime a dozen, and I go in to see what they can do for me. Very nice place actually. They take me into the back and hook up one of my favorite machines. It's the electric massage thing with the little pads. They run an electric current through the muscle and massage the nasties out of it. I love that thing.

I thought, "gee, this place is actually pretty good". Yes, then the doc comes in and sticks needles in me. Now, the needles are pretty slim little things. Not much to them, but remember, the skin gets punctured and the needles go in. I think I pretty much understand what the needles are doing, interrupting the electrical flow in the muscle causing the muscle to relax and heal. (layman's terms, but that's what logically I have deduced. If you know, please share with me.)

The tables in this place that you lay on leave much to be desired. You are laying on a really thin pad laid over a table top and covered with material. Not very comfy. Ever lay on the floor for a long time and have your ribs begin to rebel. Yep. The problem is, with those needles in you back, you really don't want to move much. I discovered this the hard way. I'm laying there, (by the way, the table is pretty narrow and up against the wall so I can't even lay my arms out to get comfortable) and my shoulders are going numb and my ribs are like, "dude, we're walkin if you don't stop this, we have rights you know, our union rep will be down your throat if you don't knock it off." So... I try to move my arms around and shift my weight. Ouch!!!!! For such a little needle it caused a lot of pain. Yikes!!!!

The long and the short of it all was that I felt much better, until recently that is. It worked once so why not try it again right? Well, ... as this blog is getting really long, I'll end here for now. Join us next week and see, will it be splat went my back or don't eat the frog? Look...up in the sky! It's a bird, it's a plane, it's a frog. A FROG??? Not bird nor plane nor even frog, it's just little old me ... (do you know?
:-) ha ha ha.

5 Comments:

At 2:39 PM, Anonymous Deb said...

you definitely need to end the medication - - - i havent seen so many tangents in a long time. You could always sleep on the floorfor a few nights. That would make your bed seem so much more comfortable!

 
At 11:44 AM, Anonymous me said...

OH ha ha, how bout I sleep on your head! :-) Just kiddin :-P lol

I had fun with this last post. I had to laugh. Sleep well, I know I probably wont. :-P

 
At 9:23 AM, Blogger Darren B said...

"They run an electric current through the muscle and massage the nasties out of it. I love that thing."


Oh, doesn't that just sound like fun? Let's run enough current through our bodies that our muscles react involuntarily. Yipee. (Yikes!)

I've never been comfortable enough to relax with that monster attached to my body. (I changed a light fixture in my youth and didn't realize that turning the light switch off and turning the breaker off were two completely different concepts. OUCH! Now, I just can't relax near electricity... bummer).

Hope you find some realiable relief (and I'm looking forward to part II of this story).

 
At 7:40 PM, Blogger Greg Kelway said...

Darren ... I lost your number. You we're calling about something. Please call again.

 
At 12:11 PM, Anonymous me said...

Hey Greg it's, 555-1212. I'm glad to see that my blog is useful :-P

Darren,
hmmm, might I suggest shocking yourself with 110 enough times that it doesn't really bother you any more. :-) That's what I did. Not on purpose mind you, just did it for a living for a short stint. I have whooaaa never noticed twitch twitch any side efefefEcts from it at all.

 

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